Bacos are NOT meat.

Bacos are NOT a meat substitute!

This isn’t meant to be a joke. I’m dead serious. I went through a pretty significant amount of time in college believing this to be true. How did I get there? Oy-vey… where to begin?

I swear at one point in my life I was losing weight the “healthy, sensible” way. I was. As time went on, it almost became a game to keep losing– which meant that I had to find foods with the lowest amount of calories and fat (because you know, both are the devil… note: sarcasm).

With the independence of college came the ability to make all choices about what I put into my body; no longer did I have to eat sensible portions of the meals that the Mom had made featuring a healthy variety; so I figured out how to eat the BIGGEST volume of food with the LEAST amount of impact on my waistline. And, may I say… I was GOOD at it!

One of the first things I did when preparing college was buy a scale. I “needed” it to “keep me in check.” (I had self-imposed fear to stay at the weight I had worked so incredibly hard to attain.) I look back now: RED.FLAG.

I had my food patterns down to a “science.” Ooo- did I mention that I was eating COLDSTONE frequently and STILL losing weight?! Whenever people would call me out about getting “too skinny” I would throw that in their face.

Of course, that was only 1/2 the story.

If I was being truly honest with you, you’d know that I was only eating lettuce, Bacos (because I needed meat), and popcorn (because I could eat a lot for so little calories). The ice cream was my source of calcium. It all equalled a very “balanced” diet in my own mind. The best part, as I mentioned, was that I was still losing weight.

You see, for 2 years of my life, I let my happiness rest on
whether the scale went up or down.
I knew nothing else.

So… I was still “winning.”

My friends and I laughed about it. They might’ve been legitimately concerned but unsure how to approach me on it, and I was totally on the defense, you know- “laugh with me, not at me.”

Food can be just as strong as a drug. It can make you do absolutely ridiculous things. Back than, I refused to look at something like the idea of using Bacos for a meat substitute as anything but unhealthy or a bit ridiculous.

It was total and udder denial.

For the first time, I’m willing to not only admit that I had these irrational thoughts, but agree that I was incorrect in my thinking. It wasn’t healthy.

I’m starting to discover the things in life that REALLY matter. Like my character, my family, my friends, my health… NOT a +/-1 pound on the scale between 7am and 3pm in a day. Or eating less calories than yesterday. Or exercising 1/2 hour longer than last time.

know I’m not the only one who’s ever had these types of thoughts. You’re not crazy, stupid, odd, dumb, or anything else self-defeating for having them. You are just a little misinformed, and maybe a little scared (at least I was). You are also NOT trapped. And NOT alone.

You are enough.

Be brave and be honest with yourself and others.
You’re worth the truth.

And seriously, the truth WILL set you free!


About fixedonfood

I empower women to overcome food obsessions with sensible solutions based on personal experience.

Posted on March 8, 2012, in Emotional, Nutrition/Culinary Corner, Physical, Social, Spiritual and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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